28.3.05

Rainy days and mondays

Walkin' around, nothin' to do but frown... Rainy days and Mondays always get me down...

I love the song made popular by Richard and Karen Carpenter. I grew up on the Carpenters and as a tribute recorded that very song for my Christmas cd, "Free Duckies for Everyone". However, I must confess... I do enjoy rainy days and Mondays have for the past few years been my day off. So why do I bore my readers with such trivial information... hmmm... Nope! I got nothin'! Sorry.

I've been wrestling with some past sins recently and this weekend and I encountered my Savior in a convicting and redeeming way on Good Friday. I had the opportunity to contribute my art to the prayer service Friday evening at CGPC. I put a video together to accompany a live performance of song I wrote inspired by Psalm 63. As I awaited my "performance" in the balcony, I listened to the last words of Jesus before his final breath on the Cross. After each of Christ's seven last words, a candle from the menorah was extinguished and in response to Pastor Steve declaring, "Lord Jesus - You gave Your life for us," together we all repeated, "You suffered and died that we might be made whole."

I kept meditating on that... "YOU, Lord Jesus, SUFFERED and DIED that I might be MADE WHOLE." Why does my life not reflect that? Jesus took upon Himself the curse for my wrongdoing so that I could be called a child of the Most High God. I moved from contemplating the weight of this truth to worshiping this same Wonderful Maker and Rescuer to Whom alone my allegiance belongs through the words of King David and the craft of my artistic passions... I left some stuff at the Cross that evening... the very stuff for which Christ suffered and I embraced His mercy. I hope that others will find themselves embracing the incomprehensible love of the One to whom our hearts cry out, "Abba, Father!"

22.3.05

Shapes and sizes

A week ago Sunday I had an amazing conversation with a few close friends. We shared vision for the Church and the ministry. I then shared with my brother Ryan the bizarre and wonderfully unpredictable story of how God brought me from high school through college into marriage and adulthood to the exact place I am today... I've had similar conversations with likes of Kyle and others and have been blessed to see how my story has encouraged them as they wrestle with identity and future and purpose... I am where I am today, not because I made all the right choices and planned my future step by step to be at a particular place at this particular time in my life. I reached a point in my life where I realized that to search for all of those things--identity, purpose, life--outside of Christ, who is the very author of my life, was a hollow pursuit. Letting go of all our plans for the future and all our dreams to trust Jesus with them is the beginning of a wild and dangerous ride that sends us up and down through life like a roller coaster, unsure where it will take us next and uncertain when it will end... But man, what a ride!

I read an article in Youthworker magazine yesterday about students and career counseling... something I never had much interest in as a student. Don't get me wrong, I think there is value in seriously considering where God might be calling you in regards to career and ministry, but part of figuring that out is in the shaping and seasoning we experience in those uncertain seasons of life when have no clue of what the future holds and all that we can do is trust Him and His promise that HE does indeed have a plan for us--"plans to take care of you, not to abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for." [Jeremiah 29, the Message]

The revelation that popped for me in reading this article went something like this: The most important job that youthworkers have with students is helping them to find their identity in Jesus Christ and to experience, learn, and truly believe that they are a deeply loved child of God... My identity, your identity should not and cannot be found in what we do, but in who we are. And who you are is a deeply loved child of God. Do you believe that?

"Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out; you formed me in my mother's womb. I thank you, High God--You're breathtaking! Body and soul, I am marvelously made! I worship in adoration--what a creation! You know me inside and out, you know every bone in my body; You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit, how I was sculpted from nothing into something. Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth; all the stages of my life were spread out before you, The days of my life all prepared before I'd even lived one day." [Psalm 139, the Message]

11.3.05

An apology and other assorted bits

I must apologize to the kats whom I share breakfast with on Friday mornings. I rented the film "Ray" last night and began watching after Tyler and Ryan left my place... I couldn't stop watching. Jaime Foxx's academy award winning performance as the incomparable Ray Charles was brilliant. Needless to say, it was rather late by the time I got to bed. Therefore, stacked on top of my recent nights of restlessness, I failed to pull myself from my deep slumber this morning.

Good times playing the tunes last night...

Still piecing together words with music...

Praying for my brother Kyle while he's in Honduras...

My brother Jere and I are gonna "Be Cool" tonight...

Galatians awaits...

Get off the computer and spend some time listening to God...

jr

9.3.05

Bambi pun

I tell you, it's pretty bizarre waking up to an inch of snow lightly covering everything outside your window in March. Fort Wayne must be just north enough... The bulk of my weekend was spent there with my wife visiting her family. We enjoyed an evening of fine Italian dining and cake with chocolate icing in celebration of our niece's 1st birthday. I'm quite relieved to report that she did receive from her grandfather the fully restored Walt Disney® masterpiece "Bambi" fresh out of the Disney vault! I'd be remorse if I did not urge you all to hurry and snatch it up from your local DVD retail outlet before it is thrown back into the Disney vault only to be released ten years from now as "Bambi: the Ultimate Collectors Edition". But hey, what's 20 bucks, right? Bucks... Bambi... Get it?

So on the way home, my wife and I were in the mood for some mindless theatrical entertainment and we treated ourselves to a viewing of the new Will Smith vehicle "Hitch". Let me just say this: Will Smith could touch a three day old dirty diaper and turn it into gold! Two thumbs up!

Sunday was a great day... I love spending time with the kids in our youth ministry... We went duckpin bowling in Fountain Square and it was an experience! By the way, if Mr. Randy Klopp is ever coming at you with a four pound ball, do yourself a favor and get the eff out of his way! Seriously. Afterwards, my wife and I had the privilege of spending the evening at the home of our good friends Phil and Debra.

Monday, I spent much of the early day hanging out with my cousin Jason. We had lunch, caught up on our lives, played some music, played some Dig Dug, Pac-Man and other assorted video games from our youth. Good times.

Yesterday, I made dinner for my wife and we enjoyed a evening of grocery shopping at Meijer... I can't imagine enjoying the company of anyone any more than I enjoy with my wife. I love you sweetie.

Good night Harvey Pekar, wherever you are!

3.3.05

Today, Thursday...

Where has this week gone? I beg an answer! Last Saturday, I got to visit Neighborhood Fellowship and Olive Branch Community Church with my wife and several folks from cgpc youth ministries. It was a great day of serving alongside one another and worshiping God. I have to say one more time how proud I am of the work that our kids did! They worked hard and we had such fun. I'm sure Maude would be proud as well.

After having the opportunity to lead worship a few times this weekend, I was invited to play some music at a Bible conference downtown. I shared four original songs including, "Strong Enough", "Offering", "Still", and "Psalm 63". It was great to be able to share these songs with people and to hear about how God used the performance to minister to their hearts.

I've been feeling really wierd lately... kinda out of it... I'm not sure if it has to do with illness or what, but I've had a real hard time sleeping the past two nights.

I'm heading to the Fort with my wife this weekend to visit our niece for her 1st birthday! Happy birthday Megan! Plenty of time on the car ride to listen to some Crowded House! This Finn Brothers concert has made me a junkie...